Twenty-Five Days
by writerofberk
Summary: Twenty-five Christmas stories. (Hopefully.) Fluff and humor. Some cursing.
1. Lights

_**Twenty-Five Days**_

 ** _Day One: Lights_**

* * *

"I—I ain't sure this is a good idea," Silver remarked anxiously, fumbling awkwardly with the green plastic string in his frozen fingers, eyes fixed on the skinny form shimmying fearlessly up onto the snow-dusted rooftop.

"Well," Jim grunted as he hefted himself the last few inches, cheeks already pink from the cold, "it's a damn shame I didn't ask your opinion. Hand me the lights."

Silver made no move to obey. "And what if ye fall?"

Jim waved a dismissive hand. "I won't fall. Give me the lights, and let's get this over with."

Silver didn't give him the lights. "Ye should have let me do this, what am I goin' to tell yer mum if ye fall?"

"That I died an honorable death, in the course of my duty." Jim grinned when he saw the look on his friend's face. "Come _on_ , just give me the lights already. It's cold up here."

"Ye should have let me do this," Silver repeated, mostly under his breath, but he relented, surrendering the thick strand. "Or the doc."

Jim rolled his eyes. " _You_ can't get up on the roof, and the last time the doc did anything like this, he accidentally shocked himself. Twice." He reached for the lights, only to let out a cry of dismay. "You were supposed to untangle them!"

"Don't look at me! I was busy makin' sure _ye_ didn't break yer fool neck up there!"

Jim looked down at the knotted, chaotic string again, and Silver could swear he caught a small, defeated whimper.

He rolled his eyes. "Oh, for pity's sake, toss 'em back down."

* * *

"Hey, how much longer do you think you're gonna be?" Jim called down, swinging his legs slowly back and forth over the edge of the roof, his heel lightly grazing the gutter pipe every few seconds or so.

"Shut up." Silver didn't look up from the lights.

"I'm getting thirsty!" he protested.

"Shut up."

"I just want to know if I have enough time to—

"No. Shut up."

"You've been trying to untangle that thing for an hour now!"

"And I'm on the brink of a breakthrough!"

Jim groaned.

* * *

Silver was not on the brink of a breakthrough.

Jim went back inside for a glass of water, and his jacket.

* * *

"See, that wasn't that tough!" Jim grabbed the end of the cord off the ground, pushed a strand of flyaway hair out of his eyes, and turned to Silver with a smile, face flushed from the recent exertion.

"Easy for _ye_ to say," Silver muttered bitterly, glaring pointedly at the lights.

Jim rolled his eyes, and crouched down beside the outlet. " _You_ didn't even go up on the roof."

"Well, I didn't see _ye_ untanglin' those things!" Silver retorted, jabbing an accusing finger in his direction.

"Well, I didn't see _you_ stringing them up," Jim countered and, before the other could form a comeback, he plugged in the lights

Nothing happened.

For a minute, the two stared, in dead silence and utter devastation, up at the roof, before Silver collected his bearings, and rounded on Jim. _"Ye made me untangle those—those goddamn hell-lights, and didn't even pause to make sure they still worked?!"_

* * *

 **A/N: Soooo I realized halfway through that they wouldn't have electric holiday lights in their universe, but by that point, I was already too deep into this hellfic to stop. Also I recognize that I'm going to have to catch up but I don't want to think about that. Anyways, while we're here, this fic will be working within the AU I set up in _Permit Me a Father Fantasy_ , which you absolutely do not have to read to understand this b/c it's literally just an alternate universe where there are zero consequences for Silver's actions and he winds up settling down on Montressor w/ Jim b/c I am garbage & refuse to acknowledge he would probably have been caught and hanged. Anyway, I hope you guys like this!**


	2. Tree

_**Twenty-Five Days**_

 _ **Day Two: Tree**_

* * *

Jim knew something was wrong.

Truth be told, he'd gotten the sense things were a little off when Silver appeared suddenly at his side in the middle of the tree lot and tugged him away from the heavy scent of pine and fir, insisting excitedly all the while that he'd found the perfect tree for the inn – and it was perfect, Jim couldn't deny that, towering well over five feet, branches a dark, rich green, exactly the sort of tree his mother would have wanted, but all the same, a small twist of unease formed in the pit of his stomach.

Nonetheless, he nodded and reached into his back pocket, fumbling a minute with the folds of his wallet. "You catch a price?"

But Silver waved a dismissive hand. "Don't worry 'bout it. I took care o' things."

Jim frowned. "I said _I_ was going to buy—

"Ye can pay me back later if ye're that bothered 'bout it," Silver interrupted impatiently. "Let's just get it to the house first, right?"

Something about the look on his face made the little knot in Jim's stomach grow that much bigger – it wasn't that there was anything precisely _wrong_ , it was just that there was something very obviously _not right_ – but he relented all the same, slipping his wallet back into his pocket before helping heft the tree up into the bed of Silver's battered blue pickup and climbing up into the driver's seat.

They were nearly out of the tree lot when undeniably enraged but entirely incoherent shouts reached his ears through the thick, smudged glass of his window, and he glanced instinctively back towards the lot to see a red-faced woman who looked to be screaming herself hoarse—at _them_?

"Is she—is she yelling at us?" Jim turned at once to Silver for confirmation – it was probably a stupid question, the lot was almost completely deserted, he didn't see anyone else she could be yelling at, but he didn't see any reason for her to yell at _them_ , either.

"I don't think so," Silver said, a bit too quickly.

Only a moment later, the woman in the lot jabbed a furious finger in the direction of the truck, still howling at what had to be the top of her lungs, and to no one in particular.

"I think she is," Jim said. He eased up on the gas, slowing their pace and reaching to open the door. "I'm gonna go see what she wants."

"No!" Silver practically threw himself across the seats to wrap his iron fingers round the door handle.

Jim threw him an incredulous look. "It'll only take a minute! I just want to make sure she doesn't need help!"

"She doesn't." Silver still wouldn't let go of the door handle. "Just keep driving."

"You're being _ridiculous_ ," Jim huffed, giving up on the door and instead rolling down the window. "I'll just—

With the muffling glass gone, the woman's deafening shouts carried clearly. "—BASTARD STOLE MY TREE—

Silver rolled the window back up.

With a start, Jim saw in the side-view mirror, the silent, burly man working in the lot had heard her, too, and had broken into a light jog to catch up with their car—which was still trundling slowly toward the exit.

The sight sent him into something of a panic – he stole a tree, he stole a tree, he _stole_ a _tree_ – and without further thought, he slammed on the gas, and the truck shot forward in a piercing squeal of tires.

"What were you thinking?!" He managed, voice several octaves higher than he would have liked. "Stealing a _tree_?!"

"It's a nice-lookin' tree!" Silver shouted back. "And she's a bitch! Screamed at the lot boys, ye should have seen her!"

"That doesn't mean you can _steal_ from her!" Jim pointed out, hands growing slightly sweaty on the wheel. "They can _arrest_ people for stealing, they can't arrest them for bitching!" He hesitated a minute. "We have to go back!"

" _What?!"_

"We have to go back! We have to give them back the tree!"

"Are ye _insane_?"

Jim sputtered. "We _can't_ steal a tree!"

"We can't go back!" Silver protested. "They'll have yer head!"

"And whose fault is that?! _You_ tricked me into driving the _getaway car_!"

"I didn't think she'd notice until we were already gone!" Silver threw another anxious glance at the burly man. "She was busy yellin' at the lot boys, like I said!"

Jim was silent a minute, considering their options – bring a stolen tree home to his mother and just lay low until the entire thing blew over while his stupid conscience tormented him for the foreseeable future…or…

He let out a heavy sigh, slowed to a stop at the edge of the lot, and shifted into park. "Just stay inside, and don't say a word."

Three hours later, Jim finally got back in the truck, and drove them from the lot.

"…So…?" Silver asked, voice uncharacteristically tentative.

Jim didn't dare look at him – he'd had time, while assuring both the burly man and the shrieking woman that it was all just a big misunderstanding, and he was thoroughly sorry, and there was no need to press charges, he'd had time for the majority of his searing anger to cool, but he still wouldn't look at Silver, lest the sight set him off again.

When he spoke, he worked to keep his voice as even as possible. "If you ever do anything like that again, I'm going to drag you down to the station myself."

Silver fidgeted. "On the bright side, at least ye don't actually have to pay me back for the tree."

* * *

 **A/N: Inspired by a prompt which was "imagine your brotp accidentally stealing a Christmas tree". It sounded exactly like the sort of trouble Jim and Silver would get themselves into, and I like to think that even if Silver did give up piracy, he'd still be very...chaotic, he'd still tend to ignore the law more often than not, and follow his own set of rules, most of which aren't always necessarily legal. on another note, this is operating under the same "modern inventions appear & disappear when convenient" principle as the first chapter, so cars exist in their universe now! & i've talked briefly on my tumblr about how my headcanon that silver would drive a pickup truck if he had a car, preferably a piece-of-shit blue monstrosity that looks a thousand years old.**


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